You and millions other divorce cases 何100万もの離婚騒動、コメディか、それともドラマ?


You and millions other divorce cases—Comedy or Tragedy?

Today my student asked me, ”where can I read your blog?” My blog-? oh no, I totally forgot about my blog! It’s been a year since I updated my blog. This whole year was so tumultuous, I completely forgot about writing my blog. It’s been two and a half years since my husband declared divorce in 2013 May. By the end of 2014, we were officially divorced. So much for all the pledges and vows we made 28 years ago, Our family relationship came to an abrupt and violent end.

“I want a divorce. I don’t love you anymore, “is what he said. I still remember his deadpan face. My proceeding life simply was hell. I didn’t believe time heals everything. I was a tragic heroine. I didn’t do anything wrong. I worked so hard for the family. Nobody in my family got divorced. So why me? I kept going back and forth between all the internal chattering. My pride and sense of self worth went down to the bottom and beyond.

Then, a year later I met my boyfriend. He was like- a dream come true. I said, “Maybe this time I’ll be lucky. ” He devoted his life to me and gently wrapped his wings around my wounded heart.  He said he will be waiting for me until I’m totally ready. Immediately I said, sure, no problem! I’ll be right there… But it was not that easy.

I lived my life for my ex and my daughter, we were always together. And that impression and memory haunted me constantly. My ex’s image over-wrapped with my boyfriend and I often blamed my boyfriend senselessly. Sometimes I called him with my ex’s name. It was a mess. And he was always waiting for me. Gently and passionately, occasionally slightly annoyed. He had gone through a difficult divorce himself a few years prior, and he knew how I felt.

By the beginning of 2015, like the sunshine peering through the dark clouds after the hurricane, I began to feel more integrated. I felt so grateful to my boyfriend for staying close without giving up on me. Shadow of my ex’s image started to leave me. Instead of life with him, life without him became my norm. I felt more spacious inside which allowed me to welcome newly seeded love.

My boyfriend used to say, “the story of you and millions of others!” I used to feel annoyed and insulted hearing this. Because mine is a truly special story. But now I sigh and say to myself “after all, he was not all wrong”, as I turn on Netflix to watch another TV divorce comedy that I have been addicted to.

Lavender sky



きょう生徒に“先生のブログはどこで読めますか?”と聞かれ、ハッとした。恥ずかしいことながら、この1年間ブログの執筆をおざなりにしていた。というか、完璧に忘れていた。そのくらい激動の1年間だったのだ。2013年 5月夫に突然離婚を言い渡されてから2年半。2014年の終わりには離婚があっさり成立した。28年前にあれだけみんなの前で誓いを立てた夫婦関係が 目の前でいともあっけなく、粉々に壊れた。











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